Family Mapping

    Imagine you are looking to purchase your first starter home. After searching Zillow, you find 3 homes you like within your price range. How about that! They're all on the same street. You decide to drive over to the neighborhood and check it out.

    As you drive down the cull de sac, you see the first home. There’s a cinderblock wall surrounding the perimeter of the home. As you look around you notice that it completely circles the entire property, and that you can’t even see the home inside, besides the slope of roof over the top of the wall. You decide to move on.

    Next you walk down the sidewalk to look at the next house. As you get closer you see that an astonishing number of people are coming and going, in and out of the house. You also notice that there is loud music playing, people sitting on the roof, and the whole property seems to be in disarray. Empty soda cans lay all around, and you notice there seems to be no fence of any kind on this property. You decide to move on.

    Lastly as you hear the noises of the previous property start to fade away and you round the bend, you see the 3rd home. It mirrors the photos you saw perfectly! Freshly painted, yard mowed and kept up. A little white picket fence surrounds the property. What a relief it is at least one of these homes was worth the trip.

    The previous scenario may feel relatable for anybody who has purchased a home; however it is a good illustration for a specific scenario that happens in parenting. In some cases, especially in the case of a parents with only one child. (See data on only children below) Think of the parents as the house, and their actions as the fence or lack thereof. The first home with a cinderblock barricade around the property, is similar to parents who are not present. Perhaps they both are very invested in their careers and the child spends most of their time with a nanny or babysitter. This leads to children being blocked off from their parents, as they are not playing an active role.

    Next let’s take the 2nd home, with a complete lack of barriers, we can think of this like helicopter parenting, because the child (or children) have complete access to the parents anytime they want. Perhaps this looks like the child sleeping in the same bed as the parents, or the child being clingy and dependent.

    Lastly the final home, it sits with a semi permeable picket fence. This allows the children access to the parents when necessary. The parents are allowed to have time for themselves and raise their children on a unified front. It is super important for parents to put their marriage first, because there are huge benefits for the children. Children are happier and better suited for life when they know they have loving and unified parents to look up to.

 

https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC7313008/ 

"The prevalence rates of anxiety symptom, depressive symptom, and comorbidity of anxiety and depressive symptoms among college students were high, especially in only children. There were no differences between males and females in anxiety symptom, depressive symptom, and comorbidity of anxiety and depressive symptoms among all college students, only child college students and non-only child college students. Only children were associated with anxiety symptom, depressive symptom, and comorbidity of anxiety and depressive symptoms after adjusting potential and important confounding factors. We should pay more attention to the mental health of college students especially only child college students. Intervention measures should be considered for mental health in college students especially only children."